Truth

I've been reading Six Dangerous Questions to Transform your View of the World, by Paul Borthwick. I'm also working on a course on Critical Thinking that doesn't strike me as Christian-friendly. These make quite the contrast. Do you believe God to the point that it transforms your life? versus Will you let Reasoning be your way to come as close as possible to wisdom?

The Six Dangerous Questions book is assigned reading for my missionary preparation process. I'm not so very far, but it is a refreshing call to see what the Bible says and how that should effect me. For example, and I've been thinking about part of this fairly recently but the book is also discussing it, if I really think Jesus really is THE way, this influences me differently for other people than if Jesus was A way. As I was reading, I glimpsed that if we're REALLY to SERIOUSLY believe more and more, the life implications may be uncomfortable.

And then there is the reasoning class. I felt a bit offended by it because it seems that if I believe God without being willing to convert to another religion or non-religion if they come up with the better argument, then I am being a not-so-good thinker. So my pride in my intellectual ability is hurt because my faith has become a point against my being a "good" thinker. I'm not sure, but it seems somewhat as if, if the book were taken too seriously, or at least to far, that Critical Reasoning is set up as god.

Anyway, it seems like one of those moments when the way of God seems not to be the way of the World (of course).

And I'm having one of those challenging times in my life when I think it must mean that I am learning/could be learning a lot, and challenges aren't limited to the college front.

During the past two weeks, I missed five days of work (Thurs through Wednesday), but was able to return for the last part of last week. Tomorrow, my hours increase again. Supposedly, I'm going back to a 40 hour work week, but then when I thought about it, the newest schedule leaves me at 7.5 hours per day, so I'm guessing the newest schedule will be modified still.

I started back into school work. I read an interesting play which I intend to write about tomorrow or sometime not too far away. And I ordered text books for the two classes I think I'll be taking next. I'm still concerned about how part of this will work out, the part where I'm supposed to take off 60 plus or minus some hours from work and accomplish some predetermined tasks in a classroom somewhere. But if I fail at that later, then I fail later, but for now, I'm trying to keep going.

Then there are, um, life lessons? Like lesson #276 of Trusting God. Like when I realize that perhaps the one I'm most upset with for what happened in/with/to a church in another city several years ago, perhaps I've been most upset with God. And I'm the one who has got to change. You know, God could allow a devastating earthquake here that would kill lots of people. He has allowed such things before. Maybe He will again. So when I'm afraid of what God might allow,... I should just trust Him anyway. I don't have to understand.

Visiting my former city home area

I went to the city I have lived in longest for my basic skills test to meet a requirement for my college's teacher's program. I got there early, but they let me start the test early, too. I think I was done a little before noon. Then I had time to enjoy being in this city that somehow still holds emotional ties.

The first place after the test center that I got out of the car was at the grocery store that was just down the street from where our house had been, in the next block. I was impressed by the size of the grocery store, particularly how much it had in it. And when I walked out of the grocery store, I had a moment when I felt like I could just walk down the street to "our" house. This helped me realize one benefit of my family moving away from this city. After living in the country where driving half an hour or more to get some places was part of life, where I lived in Puerto Rico 10 minutes from Walmart seemed quite near a respectable selection for shopping.

After the grocery store, I drove around my former neighborhood a bit and went to the park to eat my lunch.This is a park we had gone to when I was little, the park with the sand hills to ride bikes or run on. I ate lunch and noted how bright the colors seemed compared to where I live now. It was as if my current country/smaller town life is in not as full color, somewhat like an old movie. The city had brighter colors, and then Puerto Rico had really bright colors in my memory, which makes sense as it is closer to the equator and closer to the sun.
See how pretty it was in my old city, looking up at the sky through the trees, my beloved kind of trees?

As my mom and I discussed, it was as if my current homeland had a spiritual cloud over it, but the city was in a place where the cloud wasn't as thick, and Puerto Rico is somewhere else with a different kind of cloud that doesn't affect me the same way.

Nonetheless, when I returned to my current area, the colors still seemed bright, as if I had immagined it, but I think I did not completely. I think one doesn't necessarily specifically notice the loss of light unless it comes into contrast with more light, except for the form of "noticing" which is not concious; the sense or experience of slowly wearing down.

Back to my city visit. After lunch, I took a walk in the neighborhood. I used to go on "dog walks" with a sister or two in the neighborhood, getting excersize and walking a dog. I enjoyed the beauty and the color as I walked it this last week. I tried to get good photos of the bluff that could be seen down the hill from some spots.

Immagine this bluff smoking and immagine one of the big fires that spread smoke accross our sky. Or just enjoy the beauty of it now. I really loved this part of the country. I guess I still do, though I don't know if I'll live there again.

Later, I tried to get onto the prairie that was on top of the bluff behind our house (a different bluff than the one pictured). I had some amount of trouble because of construction, but finally, with instructions from my dad, found a way up. It seemed considerably more developed. I think that there are less wheat field areas and more houses now. Here is a picture of some prairieness that was still houseless. A beautiful elevated prairie.

Here is what I think is the tallest mountain in the area, as seen from on top of that same bluff/prairie.

The end (of this blogpost).

I got off work early. I even thought that I was ready to work on Literature writing assignments when I got home. But now... It doesn't help that I don't yet have access to the specific writing assignments I wanted to see (though I could read more for it).

In general, I'm making good progress on my school. That is nice. Last Saturday, I took a history/economics/American government test. I was excited yesterday to get the e-mail that said I'd passed. And I passed by more than I expected to.

I saw some yellow leaves on some bushes/plants in our neighborhood.

Uh-oh, it's been almost a month since I last posted here!

I have three tests coming up in the next two weeks. I'm excited! I'm scared about the last one, especially. Maybe I'll decide to study more than a little for it in the next week and a half. If I pass these tests, I'll have 10 credits finished (one of which is already finished - the orientation class credit). Do I like my online college? Yes (in most areas). I like being able to study when I want and move ahead at a faster pace when I can pass things sooner. I like studying at home, but being able to e-mail questions to helpful people who respond pretty quickly.

My life is remarkably scheduled right now. When (and if) I go in to work varies depending on the latest schedule modifications, but I think I've recently been getting around 23 hours, plus or minus some, on my time card for a week. This is a blessing from God both ways. The hours that are there are a benefit, and the hours that are lacking make it easier for me to study more.

I intended to finish this by about 9:30, so I'm about 1 minute late, two now. Now five. Goodnight!

beach

Spring, 2007.

the wave is coming

see the splash.

See, today at church, someone decided to use beach

pictures for backgrounds to songs. I decided it would be nice to visit Blue Beach today between church this morning and something at church this evening (which I considered going to, but eventually decided to stay home). That was obviously impractical. But looking at beach pictures isn't, so here are some from Crashboat Beach, I'm pretty sure it was April '07.

I remember God teaching me something, and I took some pictures like this one above of the sand to remember with, but I don't remember the lesson too clearly. I think it was about trusting God to take care of me.

There is something beautiful about living in trust. Something comforting. I don't mean to imply that I've mastered this. :) Now is a good time for me to remember a little of what I know of the God to whom I belong. It is amazing to think of what He gave me. Col 1:12.

End of June, early July

Fireweed.

It's in a garden out front (and grows wild in our area. This one might have been strategically left in the garden or transplanted).

The results of a fire.
Well, really two fires that were really closely related. One or two fires total, depending on how you count.
Wednesday, the first of July, I started my online college.
And my dad and two brothers did yard work, such as burning branches from pine trees they cut down. They put the fire out. Or thought they did. See the circle of ash from the burn pile in the back of the picture?
The next day, Thursday, I studied and had an otherwise normal Thursday. My dad and brothers went camping.
Friday, July 3rd, I was off work! So I studied and studied and studied, etc. Around 5:30 I took a break. (No, this was not my first break.)
I went outside and saw smoke as if from a campfire from around where they had burned. I asked my mom if it should be there, and she said it shouldn't. So I started bringing the hose out and then spent awhile spraying water on this second patch of smoldering black land (the nearer, less conventional shaped blackened area in the picture). I didn't see flames. I saw a smoking black area. Anyway, God blessed in that we were able to deal with this fire before it got too big. Some friends came to help move some bigger logs (since my dad and brothers were gone and mom and I didn't want to attempt using a chain saw). (The picture shows the area after some logs were moved, after a good bit of brush was cleared away to aid in the fire-putting-out, and after the sprinkler had spread water on it all night.) So it was very exciting for me.

I also went on a hike with my dad and brothers near the end of June. Here are a few pictures. By the way, there was a patch of snow up there. My brothers enjoyed sliding down it. I think one brother used a rock as a sled. I think all of them tried sliding on their feet standing up. I "tried" sliding on my feet for a foot or two - on accident.